Though parenting is a dynamic process and reflects the progressive changes of the times, yet in Indian context, it has undergone a sea change in the past several years and is still at a spin. Parents have become over involved and over protective. There is a makeover of parents of this generation.
According to Dr Biswajit Saha, Director, CBSE, there are four kinds of parents—helicopter parents, architect parents, bulldozer parents and gardener parents. Dr Saha, who was speaking at a book release function and addressing a session on parents, wasn’t talking from the point of view of any recognized classification but purely based on his worldview of parenting. But interesting categorization and this is how is explained them. Helicopter parents monitor everything from a distance and if there is a deviation, they seek to intervene. Architect parents plan everything to the detail and the chid is made to follow it without fail. The third category of parents he brought in is that of bulldozer parents, who decide and lay the pathways for children. They bulldoze any contrary suggestions or appeal. The fourth set of parents, the gardener parents, do customized nurturing and let the child bloom on their inherent strengths. He added that parenting is a subject of big research and must be given due importance along with career counselling for better understanding and support to parenting resources.
Speaking at the same event, Minakshi khuswaha, Principal – Birla Vidya Niketan, New Delhi, said that parents are the real role models in the eyes of their children and therefore, parents must be conscious of their behaviour like bragging. “Parenthood is an attitude. It is important to make childhood happy for your children and for this you must be realistic about the potential of your child so that you can provide values and exposure,” she added.
Dr. Meghna Nathani Kabra, a senior Consultant in Internal Medicine, while narrating her own hassles and depression of being a working parent felt parents need not be perfect but should learn from mistakes. “Hassled and depressed by daily struggles as a parent, I once decided to give up my job, but learning this daughter told me, I was her role model and she saw me in her. It was an insight as well inspiration,“ she revealed. Continuing with her own experience, she said that today’s children pose this question, ‘Do you know me?’ This implies that they feel neglected because most parents don’t bother to sit down to know the likes, dislikes, favourites or what they support.
Ajayya Kumar, COO of Emircom (UAE) who is also the Founder and Chief Curator of Sarvamangala Arts Initiatives in Thrissur along with Lifology’s Praveen Parmeshwar has co-authored a book titled, ‘Mindful Parenting.’ The event was organized in connection with release of this book along with a parenting dialogue. They said parenting should be committed act, once a parent, always a parent. “It is extremely important for children to listen to parents as coaches and mentors,” Kumar added.
Dr Kiran Bedi, former IPS officer and former Puducherry LG, who delivered a keynote, brought in the perspective of accidental parents. She talked about the importance of parenting education and engaging them through school mechanisms. Based on her own experience while being the LG in Puducherry, she said that low income and low educated parents who send their children to government schools mostly must be sensitized and told of parenting. This can revolutionize our society as most evils are connected to inept parenting and bad home environment.
—Autar Nehru
